Took Bird to get some lunch

What can I say he gets angry if I don't include him in my day to day activities.

I tried

Well I am sure my loving family is out with their out of town guest and I am. Sure what ever they decided to do I would be jealous. I have been trying to FaceTime with them all night with no luck. I am sure I will catch up with them tomorrow or definitely Monday after the girls get off school. I spent all day today talking to my Task Force about our new ROE (rules of engagement ) our Brigade Commander made us take a safety stand down day today so we could reflect on the two CIVCAS engagements that we had. Monday the Boss and I are having lunch with the CG(Commanding General) he is flying in form Kandahar, no idea why the Boss has no idea either we can both be surprised, oh boy can't wait. Have I mentioned lately how much I still love my job, well as much as I hate being away from Marie and the kids I do still love what I am lucky enough to be able to do. I feel honored and blessed to be one of eleven Apache Attack Battalion SIPs ( standardization instructor pilots) it blows my mind every time I think about it like that. The entire Army only has eleven Attack Battalions and this one is mine, the kid from price hill who dropped out of school and struggled for over a decade was lucky enough to work his way up the ladder and take the most deployed Attack Battalion in the Army to combat and lead them from the front. I think this will be the high point in my career even if I am lucky enough to make W5 I don't think anything I do from this point on will be as rewarding as what I am doing right now. Being the SIP for the Vipers has truly been an amazing opportunity and I feel so fortunate blessed to be here doing a job that I truly love. But again, Marie, Robby, Shirley and last but not least Elli I miss you guys more than you will ever know and I thank you for the sacrifices that you continue to make for me and what I do. I am sorry for all the things that I have missed in your lives, and sacrifices that you guys have had to make to follow me around in this crazy career path that I have chosen. I love you guys so much, night all

Hard day

Well 0450 came a little to early for me that is for sure. The Boss and I flew to Kandahar for the memorial and it was another tough event to get through. I am pretty emotional to start with and these things really hit home and put me over the edge. Task Force Lighthorse did a great job, it was done with so much dignity and respect for his wishes. We all fill out a quick statement as to how we would like things to go if something were to happen to us while we are here. And the joker that he was in life was how he wanted folks to remember him if something happened. Needless to say his troop respected his wishes and it was a celebration of his life and how he did business. Not many dry eyes in the hanger, my good friend Mark who has flown with James many times on three separate combat tours got up and talked about James for ten minutes. I have no idea how he got through his speech they were best friends and I know how much he will miss him. Mark is a stronger man than I could be under the circumstances and he did such an awesome job letting everyone in that hanger get to know what a great guy James was and how much he will be missed. It's just rotten how some things work out sometimes but I know the ones we loose would want us to pick ourselves up and stay the course, we still have a job to do and they would want us to get it done. Some day we will all be out of this country and I wonder what impact this ten year war will really have on these people and this country. I know the effect it has had on me and I know that it changes people in many different ways. I would like to think that it has made me a better person in so many ways and that I have gained the friendships of some of the most amazing people that I will know for the rest of my life. The sacrifices that are made can not be measured by an means, they are so broad and they are made at so many levels. They are made at cost of innocent civilians loosing loved ones and they are made at the cost of Soldiers loved ones. I will never forget, and they will never be forgotten, these are some of the most powerful words to me now, I get it, and I will remember what I have done in this country and what I have had to do to make a difference. I will remember the Soldiers that I have served with and the ones who did not make it home and they will help me to always think about what is truly important in this world. And as for things that just don't matter, I must always try to put things into perspective, time with my Wife and kids out ways everything and I must always remember that. God willing I will be one of the lucky ones, I will leave this country and go home to my family and I will make every day special. Night all

Bird caught a mouse

He has been pretty angry these last few days, poor mouse. My art collection has grown and I love it, thanks girls. Well tomorrow me and the Boss are flying back to Kandahar for another memorial service and we are leaving at 0700 in the morning which means I need to get up around 0430. So I lay her in bed trying to get sleepy only to find that it's just not going to happen. My normal day is wake up at ten ten thirty and go to bed around two am or so. The or so has a broad range as well depends on the mission set and what is going on in the area. We are having a hard time over here, this tour has been so much harder than the last one and I have only been here three months. I can't even imagine how much more difficult it will get once the fighting season starts. Our BDE has lost two aircraft and we are responsible for two CIVCAS ( civilian casualty ) engagements. My heart goes out to those crews as well although they are not center stage right now with all that is going on with the two fallen angels that we have had in the last week, they still have my sympathy. Sometimes the aggressive ground force commanders that we support get a little excited with how kinetic their situation is and rightfully so I can only imagine how difficult it is for them on the ground in a fire fight. But as a gun pilot we must maintain our tactical patience and make sure that we do all we can to avoid a CIVCAS engagement. I have had to tell commanders on the ground that they must develop the situation better for me so that I have a clear picture as to where all friendlies are and where the enemy is located and that the enemy is clear from any friendlies or civilians. Where this becomes difficult is when the GFC ( ground force commander ) is pinned down and they can not see what is beyond the enemy that is shooting at them. As an AMC (air mission commander) I am responsible for all munitions that come off both aircraft in my AWT ( attack weapons team ) and as difficult as it is I must have the tactical patience to insure that munitions that come off either of the aircraft in my team will not harm any innocent Afghani. These people have been fighting there entire lives, they know how to use their surroundings to their advantage and how to use innocent people and children. I pray that I am never put into a situation where I have to make a decision that could put folks in harms way. And like I said I truly feel for my friends that have done so and will have to live with their actions for the rest of their lives. I will always do everything that I must do to protect the troops on the ground, that is my job and I am ok with that. But I too have a wife and family and I pray that I never have to jeopardize some one else's family for the sake of protecting my brothers on the ground. Well I need to try to get to bed tomorrow will be a long day, and once again I am not looking forward to it. I look forward to going home it can't come quick enough, I miss you guys, night all

Meet Bird

He will go with me everywhere, he is angry enough for the both of us, thanks girls for my new friends I will think of my girls every time I see him :-)

Some random pics on flight line

It's hard to stay focused, I am going back to Kandahar to pay my respects to another fallen Hero from the 3rd Infantry Division he was an instructor pilot who flew OH-58s and he will be missed by so many. As an instructor pilot we touch so many lives, we train every pilot that comes our way. We do our absolute best to make them better than they were when they got here. And in the process we have so many relationships with so many folks that you know everyone. The pictures I took are of Task Force Viper aircraft, aircraft that I am responsible for making sure the pilots are trained and ready to fight, that they are on their A game. I worry about all of them, many of our young pilots have never flown in the mountains before and as summer approaches the temperature will continue to increase and aircraft performance will continue to decrease. I know that is a hard thing to understand but right now we have more power than we need but come summer time we will be limited. We will have to do a lot of calculation to determine how much fuel we can take on and still have enough power to climb over the hesco walls that surround the FOBs. It's a fine line between having enough fuel to complete mission and having too much and not being able to take off safely. I will write more after I FaceTime with my girls, night all

Good Friend

Me and Bob Roebuck in Kandahar, Bob now works at the safety center at Ft Rucker and he came over to investigate the accident. I wish it were for better reasons but it was nice to see an old friend.

Second in a week

It's not been a good week, we had another aircraft crash and we lost another pilot. It was a OH-58D and it was not from my task force but it was from our BDE. It has a huge impact on how we do business we are all trying to stay positive but it's hard to sometimes. I have a lot of pilots in my task force that were close friends with the IP that died and that always makes it hard. He was a senior IP and he has touched a lot of lives in there community so we are going to try to get as many folks as we can to the ceremony up at Kandahar. The Boss and I will fly up in an Apache and we will bring two UH-60s with us to try to allow as many folks as possible attend the memorial service. I pray for his family I can't even imagine how hard it must be, the other pilot is still in critical condition and has all ready gone under several surgeries. Well it's after two am and I am falling asleep as I lay here typing this post. I did get to talk to Robby and Shirley tonight and that cheered me up quite a bit. It's hard to imagine how the folks in the other task force are feeling both aircraft that crashed are from the same task force and my heart goes out to all of those guys I hope they are able to get past this horrible tragedy and continue their mission. I will try to write more tomorrow, I am a little tired and a little sad I hope you all understand, night all

Afghanistan

Today started out ok but sometimes things just aren't what they seem. I will try to call home again to talk to the kids and then I will be going to bed it has been a long miserable day and I need to get some needed rest. It's is starting to heat up over here in more ways than one and we are all doing the best we can to adjust to the temperature but some things are just out of our control. I am on tomorrow to fly one of our new PLs (platoon leaders) to get him up RL1 so we can start using him on mission flights all I have to do is knock out his multi ship task and he will be ready to move on to mission flights. Well it's late I am at a loss for words I am sure I will have more to say tomorrow but for now I am spent, night all

The Service

The Boss and I flew up to Kandahar for the memorial service and that was one of the hardest things I have ever been through in my life. Five Soldiers who will never see their families again who gave their lives for the good of their nation. The service was held in a great big hanger and it was standing room only. I had no idea that it would have the impact on me that it did, I did not know one person on the crew but yet it didn't really seem to matter. It was an extremely emotional event and made us all think about our own situations and how fragile those situations can be some times. I will do my best to hold folks to a higher standard and to hold myself to a higher standard as well. We must stay focused and do our best in everything that we do over here. Sometimes the simplest thing can put you in harms way and we can't afford to make mistakes that will put us in a bad situation. We just had an extremely loud explosion and since the Big Voice did not go off I can only assume that it was out going. I will not miss this place, I will miss the people for sure but I will never miss this place. I am getting pretty tired its been a long day and I need a good night sleep. I miss home, and I miss my girls and I can't wait to see all of them. I love you Marie, I love you Rob, I love you Shirley and Elli I love you so so so so much, night all

P.S.
Shirley your videos rock thank you so much for keeping me up to date on everything that I am missing, I love you!

Trying hard to recover

We are all doing the best we can under the circumstances but tomorrow I will be in Kandahar for the service and I am not looking forward to it. Although I knew none of the crew personally they are still apart of us all, we are all touched by this tragedy. I have an entire company of UH-60 pilots here in my Task Force and they have lost close friends and that affects us all. We have no idea what happened only speculation and that is not what I like to deal in. We will wait till the accident investigation team figures out what went wrong and in the mean time it has to be business as usual. Bob Roebuck my friend from flight school and my room mate from my last tour is over here from the Safety Center from Ft Rucker to do the investigation. I am sure I will see him tomorrow at the service in Kandahar. Well as much as I know it would have done me some good to try to FaceTime with my girls tonight, I have to be up early to fly up to Kandahar tomorrow so I really need to get to bed. But first shout out to Shirley for keeping me in the know with her awesome videos Shirley could not get through this without you. Got another video today and it helped to cheer me up, thank you. Well I will talk to you all soon, I hope all are doing great and looking forward to spring, I know I am I hate the cold weather. Night all

Hard day for the Vipers

11 March 2013 around 2115 hours, I got the news that one of our own went down just north of Kandahar. I had no information about what happened and did not figure we would till the next day at the earliest. At 2345 there is a knock at my door the LTC wants me in his office for a VTC (video telephone conversation) with F06 the Brigade Commander at 2400. That’s when I found out that we lost five Soldiers, I still had no idea as to the events that led up to the UH-60 crash landing, only that the aircraft was consumed by a post-crash fire and there were no survivors. This was a sad day for Task Force Viper and Task Force Falcon, we are all doing the best we can but we must remain vigilant and always remember the enemy has a vote and not to become complacent. All I have said from the moment we got here is my biggest job is to bring all these guys home. This country will never change they have been fighting for centuries and once we are gone the drug lords will move back in and the Taliban will take over once again. This Saturday me and the Boss are flying to Kandahar for the memorial ceremony, I have no idea how hard it will be to stand in a formation and listen to folks talk about our lost fellow Soldiers but I know it will not be as hard as their loved ones back home. I sit here getting emotional just thinking about it. It reminds me of when the soldier came to me with uncle Bobs flag and said those words that I will never forget. On behalf of a grateful nation please accept this flag and that was about when I lost it. I pray for the families and I pray for all the friends and loved one that they will be missed by. This place sucks, and they have no idea what kind of sacrifices the Soldiers are making to try to better their lives, and they never will. I know that I will never forget the time that I spent in this country and I know that I will always remember the men and woman that I have served with over here. The Army is a strong community that many will never understand, relationships that I am sure will last a lifetime. Friends that will stay in touch till there dying days because they were there for each other when it mattered the most. I can't explain it you have to live it and experience it for yourself. I guess it was best explained by Jim Becker, it's the biggest union in the country, the only difference is to be a member, you have to be willing to give your life for the union member standing next to you knowing that they would do the same for you if he or she needed to.

Well enough doom and gloom, I got to talk to Robby and the girls tonight. The girls are going to a concert at the civic center tonight, it will be Elli's first concert, wish I could have been there. I hope they have a great time and I am sure they will, I can't wait to be home to go on the next one. I have fallen in love with many artist over here music can really bring you up, don't get me wrong it can take you down just as quick but all in all it's great to listen too. I wish I had more to say, but I am feeling a little down and I think I am going to call it a night and hope tomorrow is a much better day. Again my prayers go out to the families that where notified today that their loved ones died defending our great nation and will be coming home early, in my mind they will always be Heroes and I will never forget their sacrifice. Night all

Art work

These art works are displayed with pride in my RLB for all my friends to see and admire, they were made with love by some of the most talented young ladies in the world. Always know how much you girls are loved and missed by me each and every time I look at them, Dad loves you girls and I can't wait to be home with you all, night all

At the office

Getting ready to go give a PIC eval and the other is the picture we are using for our Flag certificates that I took of my wing man at about ten thousand feet up in the mountains, night all

In the house

Here are two shots from my RLB ( no idea ) reusable living building? Or Relocatable living barracks ? Rob's lair bitches. I truly don't know what RLB stands for, but this is what the inside of mine looks like......night all

Two Instrument rides

I am not complaining it was going to be three and then one had to cancel due to our guard force possible having to leave early. This place is getting crazy, but hey we are all crazy right? I got a wake up call from my girls at six this morning and never was able to fall back asleep but its always nice to talk to them. The geek squad came to the house to fix a few things, it never fails things always seem to quit when I am not home to do the simple things. Fortunately we had a free visit from the geek squad and the girls got their money's worth out of that guy this morning. He fixed the computer and the printer so I feel pretty lucky.

Shirley I watched my last video last night and it was great, you do such a great job keeping your Dad in the know as to what is going on in Savannah. I am thankful for you hard work putting them together, one of my favorite parts of the video I watched last night though was shot by Mom. It was when she came into wake you up on valentines day and Marley stuck just her snout out from under the covers she was too cute. As much as I did not want that little dog she sure has grown on me. And Elli your cat is something else too, I hear he now knows how to get up on the counter and open drawers so he can step down into them and lay down. He is to cute as well.

It's starting to get pretty warm here and it's only a matter of time and we will be getting busy, I hope to be able to write as often as I have been but time will tell. One of my good friends from one of the other Task Forces was involved in a CIVCAS (civilian casualty) their is an investigation going on right now and even though I think under the circumstances he will be ok you just never know. I feel for him though because I can't even imagine how he must be feeling, he is a good person and I know that is something I think about all the time and I am sure he does as well. I know what my job is here and I will do it the best I can but I hope that I am never put into a situation that will put me in jeopardy of shooting the wrong target. But sometimes the situations get so kinetic and so fast paced that you truly have just seconds to make decisions that might haunt you for the rest of your life. But if you don't the consequences might haunt you for the rest of your life as well. Our job is to cover the ground troops that are sometimes going door to door looking for bad guys or weapons or HME ( home made explosives) and when it's pitch dark and you are trying to keep track of 30 to 60 guys in a small town kicking in doors doing the searching it gets really stressful. Especially when you are the air mission commander who basically is responsible for everything that happens on that mission. I will keep you all posted on the outcome of the investigation once it's complete. It's time to call this war complete and get our troops home we can no longer influence what is going on over here, we are spread to far and thin. This draw down is going to be the most critical part of our ten plus years of fighting over here. We need to be diligent and methodical and cross every T and dot every I and get everyone out safely. Well I am getting pretty tired I tried to FaceTime three times tonight but the girls would not answer I am sure they are busy with something. I will write more soon till then, night all

Got two packages !!

Today started off like most days, I got up took a shower and went to get some chow. Yesterday I flew 5 hours and tomorrow I will fly even more its me and Dave Lewis on again for tomorrow. So anyway I went into the office after lunch and checked my email and I had one from the Apache career manager Todd Seville, he is looking to fill six IP slots at Ft Rucker for April 15. I wish I had more people I have two guys that are ready to track IP but I can't afford to loose them with the fighting season getting ready to start. I know though once we get home we will loose half of our IPs and we will be hurting to get our guys trained up for what ever is in front of us. Hopefully nothing is in front of us but none the less I am tired of doing more with less and that seems to be the new Army's standard remark. Army of One, that seems to be to true these days and with all the future cut backs it's just going to keep getting harder. So back to my title, got two packages today, I am lucky to have such wonderful girls Shirley your videos keep me going. I sometimes feel like I am right there with you guys, where to start? Well for starters I loved all of the hidden artwork that you guys found and included in my box, and I agree Robby's artwork was too cute and I laughed my ass off too. You kids have grown up so fast, Mom and I are so proud of all three of you. I had time to watch the first video tonight and it was a hoot, I will look forward to watching the next one tomorrow after my shift ends. I have two separate missions tomorrow should be around five to six hours of flight time but will probably be in the aircraft for eight to ten hours so it will be a long day. ( mental break)

Ok new train of thought I am sitting, correction laying on my bed typing on the iPad listening to music while I type with my touch screen keyboard and not doing to bad I am actually getting pretty quick at it. I will spend more time once I get home listening to music and less time listening to the news which is as depressing as he'll anyway so I think music is the way to go. As a family we are going to see more concerts as well life is short and we have to experience as much as we can in what little time as we have on this earth. Mom is a couple of concerts with the kids ahead of me but I plan to catch up and over take her. Its just got to be the right kind of music and near Savannah not that I am afraid to travel lord knows I love a good road trip as much as the next guy. I hope that once I am home we are not as busy at work and even if we are by then I should have close to two and a half months of vacation saved up and I plan to take it all. Robby we are still on for something when you have time I hope that this summer you are busy at jump school or something similar, but we will definitely have some father son bonding time before you get out of college. Shirley and Elli we will do something awesome as well we just need to figure out what it is that we all want to do. We live in the best country on this planet and I want to see every state, can you say road trip? I think we need to plan a trip as a family next summer to go out west, whether it be bye plane train or automobile. Whatever we decide its going to be great, I personally loved the train trip to New York. It's not going to be long Shirley and you will be a senior planning your future and thinking about where you want to go to college? Time goes by to quick and I am growing very tired of missing out on all the precious minutes with you guys. I can't get them back and I can't have more they are a finite amount and I am missing so many of them. I love you guys, and can't wait to be home. Well it's about that time Elli should be walking through the door at home I will try to catch her on FaceTime before she goes down to her BFFs, night all

Flew five hours

Long day but at least I got to talk to my little princess before I went to bed and that seems to make the the entire day not so bad, thanks Elli. I hope that you have so so so much fun at gymnastics tonight and I look forward to talking with you tomorrow. I am off shift tomorrow but I am scheduled to fly the next day on a big deliberate mission I am sure it will be a long day as well. I hope all are well I am exhausted so I am going to bed its one AM and I am spent, night all

Can't sleep.....

I was tired about an hour or so ago when I was talking to the kids but now I am wide awake and out of meds to help me fall asleep. I will need to go see the DOC tomorrow, he is trying to get me some Lunesta which is much better than Ambian so the DOC says. We will see once I get some and can try it for myself. So here I lay in my bed watching the clock change thinking about all the things I have to get done in the next few days and its no wonder I am not sleeping. But I have downloaded a metric ton of music on this thing and I am listening to so great songs while I type this post on my iPad. I put over two hundred songs on here and for the life of me I have no idea why I don't listen to music more when I am at home. It can be so inspirational and make you really think about so many things not always a great thing but none the less music makes you think. Just like watching a movie, Shirley sent me a movie in their last care package to me and she included the movie Pitch Perfect. It was a really cute movie and it too made me think about all sorts of things. Who knows maybe I can't sleep because my brain is in over drive and just can't seem to slow down from all the things I have spent most of my evening thinking about. This music is awesome and I which I had a stereo and not just a set of head phones. Not that they don't sound just amazing because they do, I am just saying. I am fourth seven years old and time is just clicking bye, how do we slow it down? I feel like time is passing by so quickly lately, I am sure it has something to do with the fact that I have so much to keep me busy and that I am in this wonderful place I would not like to call home. I miss my home and I miss my family, I hope that they are doing well and that time is passing quickly for all of them as well!! Girls I hope that things are going great for all of you and that things are going pretty normal for the four of you. I feel like I am all over the road with this post, I must be getting fired again I am having trouble trying to keep my thoughts straight. I was telling Robby earlier that we have Seal Team Six on our FOB they moved in this month and the too are in retrograde operations. We are trying to shift focus to retrograde operations and less offensive operations but sometimes we don't get a vote in what is going on around us. Needless to say Jonny Jihad has a vote and he knows that his fighting season is just around the corner. Once all the snow in the mountain passes melts because we all know that snow and sandals do not mix. I have a lot of new Pilots here this time and it would be great to take them all home without having to pull one trigger. It would be nice if they would just stay down in Pakistan till we are completely out of here. Hey once we leave they can have this stinking country and they can take it all the way back to the stone ages if they want. All I know is we tried, we tried to bring them out of the stone ages and helped them to develop a democracy and they truly have no interest in advancing this nation to anything more than an opium producing drug cartel ran and dominated country. The majority of these people will continue to be enslaved to the few drug lord territory controlling thugs that are just waiting for us to leave so they can move back in and control through force. The whole thing makes me sick but there comes a time when the people have to stand on their own and take ownership of their own country and make it better. Wow I am all over the map, might be because Bob Dylan just came on and he is still one of my favorites even though he is hard to understand these days, I am sure all the drugs had something to do with that. The times they are a changing, it's amazing how much I love all the old war protester artist but yet here I am sitting in combat 9000 miles from home listening to Dylan and Joplin and a slew of others. But it's ok I know what right looks like and I know that no one was harmed in the making of all this music, and it rocks and is great to listen to. Well I think I need to give it another try to try and fall asleep, I hope I have not wasted anyone's time trying to keep up with my over active thought processing brain that has been all over the road map tonight. To all my family and friends, night all

Sunday 24 Feb

Not a bad day, I spent most of it reviewing awards for the entire Task Force, Ouch, but it has made the day go by quickly so who cares. No mail today but I hope to get another package from the girls soon although Shirley has all ready told me that the video she thought she sent was still in the computer. Well that just gives me more to look forward to next time I get mail. I flew 5 hours last night doing a Pilot in Command check ride on one of our new CW2's Dave Stewart, we now have one more PIC to help with the work load. I am not staying in the office late tonight I need to get back to my room and try to Face Time with the family before boy child goes back to school. I will post soon, night all

Shirley

I spent most of my night watching what few videos I have of my little girl doing some amazing things. She is such a gifted young lady and she should be proud of the wonderful things that she has accomplished in her life. One video that I came across was her in her room singing a song and playing the keyboard to a song that she tought herself to play and sing in just two days. She always gets so mad at me for being the proud father and showing this video to anybody, I sure wish I had fast Internet I would put it up, but I can't. But I am going to post the lyrics it's a great song especially when she is singing it....

By the time I was your age I'd give anything to fall in love truly
was all I could think,
that's when I met your mother
the girl of my dreams,
the most beautiful woman that I'd ever seen.
She said boy can I tell you a wonderful thing?
"I can't help but notice you staring at me,
I know I shouldn't say this, but I really believe,
I can tell by your eyes that you're in love with me."
Now son, I'm only telling you this because life can do terrible things.

Now most of the time we'd have too much to drink
and we'd laugh at the stars and share everything.
Too young to notice and too dumb to care,
love was a story that couldn't compare.
I said girl can I tell you a wonderful thing?
"I made you a present with paper and string,
open with care now, I'm asking you please,
you know that I love you,
will you marry me?"

Now son I'm only telling you this because life can do terrible things
you'll learn one day, and I hope and I pray that God shows you differently.

She said boy can I tell you a terrible thing?
"It seems that I'm sick and I've only got weeks.
Please don't be sad now, I really believe,
you were the greatest thing that ever happened to me."

Slow, so slow, I fell to the ground on my knees.

So don't fall in love there's just too much to lose
if you're given the choice, I'm begging you choose to walk away, walk away,
don't let it get you, I can't bare to see the same happen to you.

Now son, I'm only telling you this, because life can do terrible things.

Well it is a little hard to read when you don't know how the music goes but I will tell you this, when Shirley sings it you can't help but to tear up. Shirley life is in front of you and you have to go after what ever you want, you can do whatever you want, you can accomplish whatever you want. Don't ever let anyone tell you no or you can't do that because you can, you can do and be whatever you see yourself becoming. Mom and I have faith in all three of you kids, look at your brother, he has a vision and nothing will get in his way, nothing will stop him from becoming what he wants to become. It is not hard to be proud of you three kids, Marie we have done good, we are not done yet but our kids are so on track to be great people that we will be so proud of. I know this to be true I feel it in my heart. Rob I know you are working so hard to become an Officer in the Army and I hope things don't down size before you get that chance. But always know that if you apply the same work ethic to any job you get after collage that you are applying to your studies you will be successful. The Army is not for everybody, there are challenges that are often hard to deal with but in my heart I know it was the right choice for me. I often think though about the hardships that the Army has put you three kids through and it chokes me up sometimes. Especially when I think about my childhood friends that I played with each and every day after school from the first grade on. And living in the same house until I was own my own living with your Mom. I hope that you guys don't ever feel cheated, because I sometimes feel like I cheated you three in some ways. Not to mention the fact that I have missed out on so many things in your lives with all the time I have spent away from the four of you. I am blessed to be your father and I thank God for the three of you every day. Your Mom and I will be lucky to have you three picking out our old folks home, time to call home...... Night all

Two nights in a row

Well it's been nice video chatting with Robby the last two nights, he is doing so well with everything I am so proud of him. Last night I was up till after 0200 talking with the girls, that too was really nice. I have been pretty busy this week I was tasked to review all of the deployment awards, you all know me I am the last one to be looking at one page narratives on what folks did while they were here for grammar and spelling errors. But hey I will do the best that I can, at least I also get to make recommendations on upgrading or downgrading said awards. Most of our pilots and crew chiefs will receive Air Medals and they are all so deserving, as for the rest of the folks here at FOB Wolverine they will receive all sorts of awards based on their duty performance and what their job was. As for me I will be happy receiving a certificate of get the hell out of Afghanistan. Not that we have one of those but it would be nice, I have never done the job for recognition I have always done the job for my love of flying. However as of late in my currant job as the Task Force SIP/CWOB I find myself flying less and spending a little more time at my desk covering down on things that I am not particularly fond of. Like I said in an earlier post I just initiated the paperwork to end Brad Craig's flying Carrer which I had a hard time with. I tried so hard to motivate him and to get him back on the horse but in the end it was his decision to stop flying and I had to respect that. Little did I know that I would then spend the next two weeks talking the Boss off the tower from going after this kid with both barrels. LTC Schaap wanted to continue to push this kid and keep him flying and I guess for the Boss that has to be his party line of thinking. But I had to explain to the Boss that Brad came forward and spoke the truth and told us that he just did not feel that he could perform as a good pilot and we had to respect that. I continued to explain that if anything where to happen while Brad was out flying even if it had nothing to do with Brad the accident investigation team that will come over here from Ft Rucker to investigate the accident will rip through his command and end his career and mine too. They would be like, let us get this straight, this pilot came to you and said he did not feel he was up to performing as a pilot and you sent him out anyway? Yea your both fired!!

Time seems to be going by pretty fast over here this time, not nearly the free time I had on the last deployment, not much time to watch TV or movies I spend most days either flying or in the office for 10 to 14 hours a day. I have lots to keep up on, but I don't mind we have a great Task Force filled with many great people and I am lucky to have the job I have. The army is over 500,000 troops strong and me and ten other lucky guys or gals are blessed with the responsibility of being the SIP for one of eleven AH-64D units in the Army. And for me to be lucky enough to get this job for the most deployed combat unit in the Army is an honor and a privilege that I will remember for the rest of my life. Now I just need to make sure I don't screw it up....well it's five minutes till two AM so I need to hit it, night all

Sad day

Not for me but any time I have to start the paperwork for a flight evaluation board is a sad day. One of my Apache pilots that failed an evaluation with me after I was done asking him questions for his APART took three sheets of paper out of his pocket and be an to explain to me that he feels that he can fly the aircraft and talk on radioes and shoot the weapon systems. But when asked to do all of those things at the same time, he feels that he will never be able to accomplish that. I respect his honesty, however that leaves me one pilot short with no one inbound. We will get buy and we will make the mission work but none the less we are a man down. I respect his feelings I think a lot of it is the fact that he feels that he could never forgive himself if he can not do his job in the aircraft well enough to keep the guys on the ground safe. I know how he feels that is something we all have to deal with, sometimes when things are going kinetic and you have 60 friendlies on the ground and you are trying to keep eyes on the front line trace it gets really hard to keep an eye on all things going on. But we do the best we can do and hope for the best.

I will be trying to face time with the girls here in a little while, I tried to catch up with my Boy but I guess he got caught up with something at school. I miss you Rob I will try to reach you on Facebook tomorrow. I enjoyed talking to you yesterday while the girls were out in Savannah and I hope to FaceTime with you the weekend after this one. I hope your FTX goes well, and you have a good time.

As for me I am keeping busy I fly less than most which is good because I have five times the paperwork to keep up on than most as well. Tomorrow I get my first batch of deployment awards to start reviewing. It makes no sense to me that the awards have to be turned in so soon and I really don't know why I am part of the reviewing committee. It's me the LTC and the Sergeant Major and we have to look at all of them. That will keep me busy for the next few weeks I am sure. I have been trying to take as many pictures and video as I can of FOB Wolverine we are under way starting to tear this place down and it's only a matter of time before this place looks nothing like it did when we got here. I have no idea what the future holds for us here, we are being told that we will be moved north to FOB Apache and we will operate our mission set from there. Only time will tell and there is even some rumor that some of us might even get home a little early. I try not to listen to any rumor because nine times out of ten they never work put the way you want them to. Well it's about 12:30 AM here I think I will try to call the Girls, night all

Another long day

Well it started out pretty good, but today was pilots briefs which I like to do at three different times which makes it a little easier for all the pilots to attend. So my day starts a little earlier and ends a little later all in all it's ok. Tried to FaceTime with Elli but she is not home yet so I figured that I would put a quick post up and try her again. Did have some news today my top secret clearance was finally approved, thanks to all of you that we're interviewed and sorry for the inconvenience. It is good for five years and once you have one complete it kind of easy to get renewed if I end up finding a job outside the Army that needs one. There are of plenty of jobs out there so I have been told but I think once I am done with the Army I want to be done.

I posted into Elli's journal again tonight, I really love that thing she did such a good job keeping it a secret, miss you Elli....

I am flying tomorrow, I will be giving the newest pilot in our task force an instrument check ride I can only imagine how that will go. Time will tell, we have two brand new LT's that we just got right before we left. They just got issued flight gear a week or so ago so I am sure they are both ready to get their flight training on. It's hard to be leave that I started twenty years ago on my own flight training. WOCS in October of 1992 and flight school in January of 1993. Time has gone by so quick how can we slow it down so I can cherish it and savor every day? Oh well speaking of time it's time to call my Girls, night all

Shirley's first match

How could I not post tonight, I have never been so proud of one of my kids from 9000 miles away. Marie what can I say but thanks to you and Elli for bringing me to the tennis match live from your iPad. And Shirley you played like a rock star, but I want you to include what ever footage you super sister captured for you on my next video. I have never been so happy over here that will Cary me through a few weeks for sure. Like I was telling Mom today was not a great day for me I am in the process of ending the Carrer of one of my kids who is right out of flight school. It's really hard for me too because I can respect and understand where he is coming from, he in no way want to be responsible for lives on the ground based on his ability in the aircraft. He told me he feels that he can fly ok and that when he shot gunnery with me he thought he did ok, which he did, he was not do to bad. But when it comes to listening to five different radioes and keeping the sensor on thirty different friendly forces on the ground who are running from building to building he knows in his heart he will never be able to master the skill set that is required to perform his job in the aircraft. And in his own words " I will never allow myself to put troops in harms way because I am not quick enough at my job in the helicopter " I feel for him but I also know that I have a job to do so my recommendation to the Boss will be that we sit him until the outcome of the FEB ( flight evaluation board ) is complete. He is a great kid and he has a great work ethic so hopefully the Army will let him retrain into something else and allow him to remain a Warrant Officer, but that is not for us to decide.

Well now it's two thirty and I have to be up early but I just wanted to thank Marie and Elli one more time for bringing me to Shirley's tennis match with them today. That was awesome and I will never forget how proud of her I was she played like a pro and it was great to watch her from the other side of the world. I love all you girls and Robby I wish I could be there with you tomorrow when you get welcomed into the honor society for maintaining your 4.0 GPA I am so proud of you too. I miss all you guys so much, good night to all of you......

It's been a few days

Wow what can I say it's getting a little busy. Not busy with bad guys but busy with paperwork and email traffic. We are in the process of trying to figure out how we are going to turn this FOB into a gravel parking lot when we leave. I have been through this before in my short Army career when we left Albania we left that place with nothing everything we brought we took with us when we left. This place though will be a little different we will still be conducting combat operations till the last day we are here.

Well today was Patch day, which means that all of our Soldiers that did not have a combat patch received there first combat patch that they will wear for ever more on their right shoulder right under their United States Flag. It was a pretty big to do I took as many pictures as I could but the whole thing was just too fast. LTC. Schaap patched all the new Commanders that did not all ready have a patch and then they went and patched their companies so it started slow and got quicker and quicker. All and all it was pretty good event.

Tonight I was able to talk to Robby and the girls minus Shirley who was at tennis practice. I got to talk to Robby in his room at GSU and the girls I FaceTimed with at the house. And now it's about 0215 in the morning and I need to hit it I have a busy day tomorrow. I hope to start writing more in the future I will be close to having all the progressions and APARTS done and I plan on cutting back on how many days I fly over here. Right now I fly around five days in ever week on a rotational basis but I hope to cut that down to three to four. We will see oh well till next time, night all

How goes the WAR

Not trying to be funny, just trying to figure out what it is we are suppose to be doing over here? We fly to protect the ground units and keep them out of harms way, we are their eyes and ears from above we can see beyond that next ridge line. We know what right is suppose to look like and most of us older guys can sure pick out what wrong looks like too. It's not a game we are not trying to win points we identify potential trouble spots and we ask for permission to make those troubled spots go away so it's safer for the ground units that we are paid to protect. Again it's not rocket science, it's a job that has to be done and the rules for getting the job done seem to just keep getting harder and harder. I know that all who I serve with would just love to pack up all our toys and go home, but we still have a job to do here, we still have ground troops outside the wire and in harms way so please just let us do our job. Please try not to pretend that you are in my aircraft seeing what it is that I am seeing feeling threatened like I am feeling threatened and then telling me that I don't have a shot based on some crazy rules that a room full of attorneys dreamt up from back in the States. If that is what this has all come to then keep the troops inside the wire and let's start the retrograde sooner as apposed to later. Lets not loose one more life in this country for no reason, lets get all our troops home as soon as we can. But if this is not what this war has come too, stay out of my cockpit and let me do my job.

Ok venting session is over, I am not on the schedule till Friday which is when I give the A company Commander her APART check ride. She should be in pretty good spirits her husband Rich got to come for a visit from TK. I can't even imagine how hard it must be for both of them. CPT Barnett is a company commander and Rich is one of our Tactical Operations officers, he is a CW2 and he can't be here because he is a company grade officer and he can't work for his wife. I can't even imagine how hard it must be for the both of them to have to both be over here and worry about each other. Well anyway her and I will fly for about 5 hours or so and she will demonstrate many flight maneuvers we will start off doing CMF( combat maneuvering flight) during the day and then progress into the night doing all the base task. Then we will finish up with instruments, which are a lot better this trip. We have a radar approach this time which is an approach where an air traffic controller basically talks you down based on what he or she sees you doing on their radar screen. So if the weather goes to crap and you find yourself in the clouds they can radar vector you down to the airfield. It is nice to have them and their equipment here it kind of gives us all a feeling of safety. I know from my last tour Bob Roebuck and I launched to an urgent medevac and they told us when we left that we would not have the weather to get back to Salerno but we launched anyway knowing that someone was hurt and on their golden hour so we figured we would figure out how to get back after we were mission complete. Ultimately we found ourselves scurrying around the mountains flying around the clouds trying to find a sucker hole to get back to Salerno. Which we did but it sure would have been nice to call ATC( air traffic controller) and say give me a radar vector and an altitude that will keep me from slamming into the side of a mountain and vector me home. So like I said it is nice to have these guys here with us for this rodeo. Well I am going to try to FaceTime the family and then go to bed I hope all are well, night all

Quick post

It's late I am going to bed, I tried to face time with Marie and the kids but I am sure they had something after school I don't even know what day it is. Maybe it's Thursday and they are doing something fun before Elli has gymnastics. At any rate I will catch up with them soon I am not on the schedule tomorrow but I have a ton of work to catch up on and plenty of cats to hurd. I am getting pretty good at keeping everyone on the same sheet of music. We are all getting short tempered with all the proposed changes to what is going on with FOB Wolverine. Only time will tell where we are going and when so I try not to worry about it. I will try to put some more pictures up tomorrow and try to post about what has been going on here, till then, night all

So proud of him

Who would ever think I would have a son in collage, and that he would be sporting a 4.0 GPA. I did, and I always new he would do great and wonderful things. Rob don't be mad that I put this up, it reads like you knew what you wanted to talk about for a long time. I know it made me pretty emotional and you know that's not easy to do some times. I am proud of you and I know your Mom is too and I just want you to know that we both believe in you and know you are going to do great things some day. I joined the Active Army back in 1998 and I have never looked back, it has been the right choice for me ever since. It's not an easy life, and your not going to get rich off of it either. But when you look in the mirror and that guy is on the other side looking back at you and you think back at the things you have done and lives you have touched, you will know that you made the right decision. Some day you will be at a crossroad and you will think to your self what now? Do I stay in or do I get out use my degree to get some desk job that I swore I would never be happy with? I hope that you make the right decision and I hope you put your family first, the Army will only be a part of your life for a short twenty years or so but hopefully that wife and family will be by your side for the rest of your life. Just like you talked about in your story the friends that you meet along the way will always be there for you and you will always be there for them as well. You will always stay in touch with Scott Andrew and Dexter and the many more military folks you meet. But always remember that over your lifetime a twenty year military Carrer is a snapshot in time. Take time for what is important, your family, your wife and your kids, because they will be with you for ever and some things you just can't get back, I love you Robby

Dad





Robert Senefeld
Dr. ******** *********
English Composition 1101
16 October 2012
Part One: Test of the Best

“They’d done sit-ups and push-ups until their guts and arms burned with lactic acid; finished an eight mile run; parachuted 1,500 feet from a helicopter; borne a stretcher over three hilly miles; paddled themselves and their gear seven miles, then donned their water-soaked rucksacks for an eighteen-mile nocturnal road march” ( Murphy ). These feats of strength only show the physical battles that the, already proven, Army Rangers fought through during the annual, three day, Best Ranger Competition of 2004. Unlike normal athletic competitor’s, these Army Rangers weren’t fighting for more goals, fewer swings on a golf course, or more runs batted in. In the Best Ranger Competition, athletes fought to prove who was the most physically, and mentally durable. The Rangers fought through heat, thirst, hunger, darkness, sleep deprivation and raw pain. It is a grueling course that “separates the men from the supermen” (Murphy).
Austin Murphy’s article on the Best Ranger Competition was centralized around the story of Staff Sergeant Colin Boley. Boley’s brief background started in his younger years of high school, a time of skipping class and stealing garden gnomes off neighboring lawns. After graduation, Boley would hear the knock of an active duty Army recruiter at his front door. Boley learned that he wasn’t just a recruiter, but a motivationally good man. Good enough of a man, for Boley to enlist into the Army, active duty, for that fact alone. Boley’s first assignment was Hawaii. After a year there, Boley went to Ranger school, where he shared blood, sweat, and tears with his soon to be good friend, Adam Nash. Nash, now a 27-year-old Staff Sergeant in the 75th Ranger Regiment was Boley’s partner for the Best Ranger Competition. Being able to partner with Nash was the drive behind Boley’s motivation in the competition.
Surrender is not a Ranger word; that statement, as part of the Ranger creed, has been recited an uncountable amount of times by every Ranger in the Army. One can assume how intense a competition of these Rangers would be. In Austin Murphy’s article, the reader also becomes familiar with the emotional side of these Rangers. One of the events was an eighteen mile foot march, which had its own trophy, named in dedication to Russell B. Rippetoe, a Ranger killed in Iraq by a suicide bomber. The Ranger’s father, Lieutenant Colonel Rippetoe, attended the competition and told his story of coping with his loss, and the emotions behind waking up in the middle of the night to a knock at your front door, seeing three Rangers standing there with mourning faces. “In this way Best Ranger is nothing like any other endurance event. Sure, the athletes suffer similarly. But here at Fort Benning during wartime, reality periodically intruded, in the form of mothers weeping for joy and fathers remember lost sons” (Murphy).
In the end, the outcome of the Best Ranger Competition was to come down to a single event, the two mile rifle run. The two teams competing for first, Boley and Nash, and Wilson and Sheaffer, had a tight run through the whole event, and in the end found themselves all crossing the finish line together, with rifles raised in glory, embracing their families.
“After embracing his parents, Boley found himself face to face with Joe Rippetoe. The two have formed an especially strong bond since Russ was killed. Boley and Russ were good friends. Boley’s wife, Amy, used to try and set Russ up with her girlfriends. The two Rangers were born, eerily, on the same day, and Boley wasn’t that far away when the pregnant woman ran out of a car screaming for help, luring Russ to his death as the woman’s companions blew up the vehicle. Boley held the older man in his arms for a long time. Afterward, Joe Rippetoe steadies himself against the trunk of a tree until his vision cleared. ‘It’s a privilege being around these guys,’ he said. ‘They are the best of the best”(Murphy).

Part Two: Inner Strength

My dad came back from Afghanistan about a year ago, with an attitude like that of what he left with. Through the following months, I painted a detailed picture of the war through his stories, and through his captured videos. I learned about the fragility of the human body as well as how dark and desolate some places of the world can be. However, most of the things he talked and laughed about had nothing to do with the war itself, which at the time; I did not understand how he can have such light thoughts about war. Some people may ask, “How can a soldier want to go to a combat zone?” “How can a kid enlist in the Army because he saw something in his recruiter?” “How can two guys strain themselves to such extent in a competition that ultimately yielded no reward?” I had those same questions when my dad left for Afghanistan. How could I hear such scary stories about Afghanistan, but my dad was showing no emotion towards his deployment.
In the interest of my dad’s contentment and I could almost say pride, I joined my high school’s Junior Reserve Officer Training Corps program, to get a feel for the Army, as I knew there had to be something to it. I then made the cut for the Raider Challenge team, a team that competed in many physical and mental challenges, some of which are even in the best ranger competition. In Raider Challenge, I met a lot of outstanding kids, a lot of which I formed tight bonds with. Each additional day that we fought through practices together, the bonds grew stronger. By the time the competitions rolled around, we were all so excited to compete with each other and put our training to the test; we did not even think about how hard the events were going to be. Some of my friends that were not in the program would ask me, “You’re looking forward to running through mud with 50 pound ruck on your back?” I did not have an answer for them, but it helped me to realize how people like my dad, and Staff Sergeant Boley can do what they do. Some guys just do not think about the what-ifs or the downsides of a situation. They will risk it all for the guys on their left and right. All that matters to some is that sense of brotherhood, and that feeling alone can carry a man through the darkest of places.
I believe what I learned in JROTC, and what I am continuing to learn in ROTC, allows me to appreciate bonds like the one between Nash and Boley. Throughout life, there are good people and bad people where ever you go. There are good and bad people in the military. There are good people and bad people in the Army. But, from what I have seen in my life, good men in the Army are damn good men and I am sure I could say that for all branches. There are countless more stories just like the story of Boley and Nash in the Best Ranger Competition. There are men and women in this world that are willing to put their lives on the line because they want to better the lives of someone else; because they want to make that difference or even they may just want to fight for the people that are willing to fight for them. Their stories are what inspired me to be in the position I am in right now with ROTC, and when I go home on the weekends and talk to my dad, who is getting ready for his next deployment, I can respect him, and understand him. Sure, you can jump out of a plane. You can blow some stuff up. You can shoot guns, but that is not what keeps guys in. That is not why Boley and Nash went into that competition, that’s not why my dad is going back to Afghanistan. That is not why I am in ROTC. People think the adrenaline and action is the epitomic reason guys are in the military, but guys elect to stay in for far deeper reasons.

Falcon 06 Visit

Well I wish I could say it was for good reasons, but unfortunately it was not. The general told the BDE Commander that he needed to visit all three Task Force locations and have some talks. You see we have been having a string of bad luck with ND's ( negligent discharges ) which means we have some Soldiers doing things that they should not be doing. Like playing with their personal weapons and not treating them like the loaded weapons that they are. One of my CW2's had one as well and I have been doing damage control ever since. He will receive a GOMAR which is a General Officer memorandum for record which will follow him through his now much shorter career. I am trying to get it filled on his local file which means that promotion boards will not be able to see it but ultimately it will be up to General Abrams the 3rd infantry Commander. Only time will tell and and their is much work to be done to defend him. I know in his mind he was trying to do the right thing but general order number one clearly states that we are in amber status with our weapons which means keep the clip in it but do not have a round chambered. And if he was following general order number one how could he have shot his weapon through his wall and through two more portable rooms. We are lucky no one was home next door or next door to his neighbor. Then a few weeks later we had another Soldier shoot his weapon while trying to demonstrate how to properly clear his 9mm and the round hit a Soldier right in the chest fortunately for him he had his M16 slung in front of him and the 9mm round shattered the but stock and buffer spring assembly and did not penetrate his chest. It was determined that the round would have hit him right in the heart and who knows how that would have turned out. It's bad enough that I have unhappy Afghani's wanting to shoot at me but now I have to worry about Soldiers from my own FOB being stupid. That was not the extent of it either we have had a few but over all we have had 9 ND's across our BDE in three locations. I think our young Soldiers have gotten the message and I hope that we will not have to worry about any more of these happening. I am off tomorrow and I plan on getting caught up with all of my paperwork also it's Saturday night and I will try to FaceTime with Marie and the kids a few more times before I go to bed. I hope all of you are doing well and I will write more tomorrow for sure, night all

Nice night

Well Mike and I went in on what is suppose to be a better Internet connection and the jury is still out on that however I did spend some time looking at pictures thinking that I would put some on my blog. Well in the process I came across Shirley's videos that she made and I watched them all. I especially liked the one with her and katelyn and the one she did for Apache. Shirley you have a gift in how you see things and I hope you pursue your video talent. I wish I had better Internet over here because I would surly post all your videos, even the one with you singing in your room and playing the piano, you are a gifted kid and you should explore that as well. I sure do wish we were almost done over here I am ready to go home, I miss the family more than they will ever know but I am staying focused on what is ahead of me and we will be getting busy here in a few months. We have been trying to keep up on all that is going on in the states but sometimes it's hard with poor Internet and only see TV in the chow hall. But I have picked up on all the gun laws getting ready to be changed, it makes me sad that people are using tragedies to push their own political agenda. I am pretty sure the guns are not killing people by themselves but you all know how I feel. I think everyone should own a gun, and get the training on how to use it. There was a pretty good picture going around Facebook a few days back about the picture that compared gun violence and the democratic voting strong holds across the US it was amazing how similar they were. Well it's now 12:40 AM and I am going to get off here and try to FaceTime with Marie and the kids, till next time, night all

Two pictures

One of the pictures is Me and Mike having Christmas dinner and the other is looking to the south at the snow covered mountains, we have a pretty view from our FOB if it wasn't for all the angry people in this country it might not be a bad place to visit....... Night all

Typical Day

Another day down, not much to talk about. Tomorrow I fly with one of our brand new guys right from flight school, I will be doing his APART. If it oral discussion does not go well there will not be a flight portion, this is his second attempt to get through his APART. I just can't figure some guys out sometimes, we are in combat and knowing your craft is kind of important. It's not like there is anything else to do we sleep we eat and we fly, and for some of us I answer a gazillion emails when I have the time. How nice it would be to be a company pilot with no responsibility and no emails to answer. Spend a little time reading some regulations and studying some -10 ( operator manual ) for the aircraft.

I will be going from five days a week to four days a week flying once I Get all the APART's for January done. I will still have to do all the instrument check rides but as for APARTS my IPs will be able to help with that. I however am the only IE ( instrument examiner ) for Apache's on this FOB so I have to do them all. I hope to get out of here and visit the other FOBs as well and do some PIC ( pilot in command ) evals. We are being over run these days by navy seals, as small outpost retrograde they are consolidating here and they are going to make this place their home. Which is ok by me because we will be the last aviation unit to occupy FOB Wolverine. Once we leave that is it for air support in this area they will have to call folks from FOB Salerno. Speaking of my old stomping grown, last night I was watching a new movie, O dark thirty, and we were referenced in the movie. I was actually flying at the FOB doing a progression flight when the high level meeting between the CIA and one of Osama Bin Laden's messengers were going to meet at Fob Chapman. Which we new was five miles south of Salerno but weren't suppose to talk about because it was a FOB full of CIA operatives. Well they mentioned everything in the movie the bomb blast that killed eight CIA personal and shut down operations for a bit. But knowing now what that meeting was all about makes so much more sense. None of us believed The story about what had happened over there that day. I remember trying to assist but there was nothing to look at over there we just tried to stay out of the way by maintaining a high orbit and staying airborne in case they needed gun support. We did however aid in the medical evacuation of all their wounded because we had trauma at the hospital on our FOB. it was a crazy day, I might have to look at earlier post on my blog and try to find that day. I am so glad that I was able to take this blog secret so that I don't have to watch what I say so closely. Speaking of secret, how many of you have been contacted for interviews? Before I left the states I had to apply for a Top Secret clearance, I know Joe Mains has all ready been interviewed and many of the guys I work with but I had no idea how many of my family members would also be questioned. It should be done soon so hopefully not to many will be inconvenienced. Well once again I got the gift of gab, I hope everyone is doing well and I will try to post soon, night all

Great Day

Wow what can I say, I think things always happen for a reason. My day starts out like any other day here in Afghanistan I am asked to take pictures of the reenlistment ceremony followed by our Path Finders graduation. The first I am all for the second one makes me a little nervous. You see the Path Finders that I talk of are local Afghani nationals that come on our fob and are trained by our Path Finders on how to hook up sling loads and clear landing zones. And I prefer those guys stay off the FOB all together. So anyway back to my story, I am standing out side for over an hour for both of these to take place and I start to feel a little sick. I finish taking pictures and I give my SIM card to our PAO ( public afars officer) who will then try to put them all on their computer make a DVD and bring all the pictures to work and put some of them up on our Facebook page. Anyway I am off to my room to take a couple of Tylenol and try to start feeling better. Wishfully thinking after about another hour I am in the bathroom throwing up, yuck... So I go to the CP ( command post) and let the battle captain know I will not be flying tonight. Off to my room where I turn off all the lights and try to take a quick nap and hope to feel better. Not much luck so I get up go into the office where SFC Bascome tells me I have mail, so off to the orderly room to get my mail then off to my room. I received the most wonderful package from my family that I think I could ever receive. Candy, home made brownies and the best video that a home sick Dad could ever ask for. I also received a birthday card that had personal notes from all the people that I care the most about. I thought about posting what they said to me on my blog but I want to keep those things private. But guys that card made my day, and I miss all of you so much. The video was amazing and I wish I could have been there for some of that cake Shirley it looked great. I am 9000 miles away but I felt like I was there with you guys. I love how you guys talk to the video like I am in the next room and I especially love how you include me in the day to day things. Shirley the reference to me when Elli was recording you in your room and Iggy was chewing on the box and Elli kept looking away with the video camera made me laugh so hard it hurt. I love you guys so much. I hope that things continue to run as smooth as they seem to be running and that you all have a great new year and all do well in school. Robby I loved your note in my card and I want you to know that I am proud of you and I know you will continue to do amazing things at school. I am going to write more tomorrow but for tonight I am going to try to get some sleep and hopefully I will feel better tomorrow. Night all

Short post

I had a nice day off and I am in bed getting ready to try and FaceTime with the family but I wanted to get on here and talk real quick about a series that I have been trying to watch. It's all about WW2 and what Hitler did with the Jews. That man was pure evil and I just can't figure how it was allowed to happen. But as I watch this series that I have at home as well on the hard drive under documentaries it just makes me sad that this could have happened. But what I can't understand is that sometimes it seems like they just walked to the slaughter and put up no fight. I just can't understand how that part of it could have happened. I am sure in their minds they knew what was about to happen and they had the numbers to make a difference but they continued to go along with it, it is so sad. The people in this country are so different they know they are out gunned and they know they can not win against the US but they will fight with all of their being right wrong or in different to the bitter end. Even if it means that they will sacrifice their life for their cause, I can't figure them out either. I am not saying that I have sympathy for the insurgents over here that is not the case at all. I want for these people the same things that I would want for my own kids and under the rule of the Taliban that will just never be. Because we all know that the value of a woman over here is just a little more than a goat and I don't think that will ever change. We hear stories about local woman who are having acid poured on them because they want to go to school and learn and it breaks my heart. There is a local woman that works on the FOB in the laundry tent that you can tell she had acid thrown on her face I can only wonder why, it's so sad was she trying to learn to read or was it some other crazy reason. What is wrong with this world, why are people so crazy. We will be shutting this FOB down when we leave and we will be pulling out of Afghanistan in 2014 and I can't help to think of what will happen to all the people that work on the FOBs all over this country, what will happen to them? They will not be safe most of them live and work on these FOBs because they are not safe in the local towns all ready, they surly will not be safe once we leave. Many are from other countries but some are local and those are the ones I worry about. Like the brothers that ran BlockBuster back at FOB Salerno from my last tour the stories they use to tell me about the escapades they use to go through just to get on FOB Salerno to sell us DVD movies that they would smuggle in from China to support their families. I worry about all of them, I would love it if I could feel like the two years I spent in this country really made a difference. And no one would be in harms way after we pulled the plug and withdrew all of our troops. Well crap it looks like once again I have gone off the reservation on this post and just started talking about all kinds of stuff. I preach all the time for people not to stress the small stuff and trust me most things are small stuff, but the older I get the more I can't look past what I know is going on around me and not let it get to me. But this place will not be changed one bit for the ten years we have spent here, and that truly makes me feel sad. Sorry to end this post on such a downer but I am going to try to talk with the family before I go to bed, night all

Game Face

I tell people all the time to get their game face on we have a mission to accomplish over here. Sometimes its easier said than done, we do have an important mission to do but this place can take a lot out of you if you let it. I try not too but it has a way of wearing you down anyway. I am still flying five times in any given week on a rotating schedule that allows me to vary my off days and cover down on all the things that I am responsible for. I try to make my rounds every day to try to keep the peace between all my airframes and to settle things at the lowest level. But sometimes I am just a little too late and things get elevated to an all new level. I feel like I am a cat heard er sometimes and I just need a bigger stick to help me keep people in line. I am a big advocate of people need to work things out at the lowest level, primarily because it helps to build the team. But sometimes it just aggravates the situation when it gets elevated. Well most of you probably think I am talking in riddles right now so I will add some context to this ramble. My day started out when I meet up with the Task Force Commander to do his APART. He asked me if I knew anything about what was going on with the maintenance on the OH-58D's and I told him no. After our flight I went to the 58D guys and addressed the issue and apparently they are having some trouble with our AMO (aviation maintenance officer) who I will admit does have some people skills issues but none the less I thought he was in check. The bottom line is if they would have come to me I could have addressed the situation and resolved the problem so much easier. Hopefully after our conversation this will never happen again and I explained to all parties involved that if kept at the appropriate level people do not come across like they are unwilling to work together by the Boss and that is what I want.

So on a lighter note the Boss and I flew together tonight and we did his APART and for the most part it was an enjoyable flight. I have been so busy lately doing progressions and check rides that I have not had a chance to do many actual mission flights for some time now. Not that I am complaining though most of the mission flights are flying 6 to 8 hours and that sounds like too much work. I am happy logging 2 to 4 hours a night when I fly. The terain around here is pretty like I have said before we are sitting at 6500 feet and the mountains around here are anywhere from 8K to 12K high and we are located in a great big central vally with a mountain ridgeline to our south that stretches for miles. They have been snow capped for most of the time we have been here and they are pretty to look at.

Elli, again I want to thank you for your journal, I have truly enjoyed reading it. I try to only read a page when I know I have time to write back and that is exactly what I have been doing. How you kept that a secret is beyond me. It kind of makes me feel like I don't give you kids enough attention. I know Shirley probable feels that way and she may not be to far off track, but I know from here on out you will have my ear. I love you kids more than you will ever know you are my inspiration and you help me get through the really tough days. Marie I hope all is well it sounds like things are working out pretty good with Sam I never doughted it for a minute and I hope you guys continue to have a great time during her stay, she is a great kid as well. Ok I have rambled on for some time now its time for me to hit it, night all

My birthday

As you can guess my Birthday went pretty well, just got to talk to three of the best kids in this world and they all wished me a happy Birthday so what more can a dad ask for. I told them to go out and celebrate my Birthday for me by going to my favorite Italian restaurant and I think they are going to see Sam at work which is ok too. It's a close second to the best Italian restaurant in town. I think that I am a lucky man to have three great kids that truly know what is important in life and every day that goes bye they continue to impress me with their actions and their strong convictions on what is right, thanks you three. As for me I had a good flight with Dave and I have but three more minutes of my birthday and then it will be the 20th of January. I received a care package from Skyline chilly today and a Birthday card from my sister Sue thanks for both Sue. I will have to send you a picture of the chilly party that I am going to try to throw. I just need to talk to the cooks at the chow hall and see what I can get them to help me with as far as cheese and pasta and onions and what not. As for FOB Wolverine we are still standing tall doing the best we can trying to make our small part of Afghanistan a little safer for the rest of the Afghani's. I hope to get done flying tomorrow early as I can so I can get some dinner before the chow hall closes. It's getting to be a trick these days doing all of these APARTS doing a day out night return takes me right through the dinner time. Tomorrow it's me and the Boss, I am doing the Colonels APART and we will get together around 1300 and do some table talk and then head out to the Aircraft to fly for about 5 hours or so. I hope the weather holds out so we can get him done. Well I think it's getting late so I am going to cut this post short, I hope you all enjoyed my birthday as much as I did and try to remember that life is short, don't sweat the small things that just don't matter. Enjoy the loved ones around you and try to let them know how you feel as often as you can, night all

30 minutes till I am 47

Well here I am again having a Birthday in a small room in a country no one would ever want to visit let alone stay for nine months. But it's ok, I got this, I do what I have to do so others can live normal lives. I have less than four years till I can retire, then some other guy or gal can spend their Birthday in some remote location that I am sure I will not want to visit either. As for me I was off today and all I had to do was give three pilots briefs to my entire Task Force to bring them up to speed on some of the changes around FOB Wolverine. Tomorrow I fly with one of my good friends Dave Lewis, he and I will do his instrument check ride for his APART. Dave has been at Savannah for some time he is a close friend and its nice to have him here to talk to sometimes. Prior to going to flight school Dave was with the Rangers he is on his fifth deployment second as an Aviator and I am lucky to have him here with me. I know that he and I will be close friends for many many years. One thing you can always count on in the Army is the quality of the people that you will get to know. The friendships and the bonds that you develop as a Soldier with other Soldiers will last a lifetime. I can't really explain some of it but I think a lot of what keeps us together is the fact that we truly understand what's at steak. I fly with Dave on missions over here as his wingman and he flies as mine as well. And there is something to be said for a person that will watch you fly through gunfire to protect troops on the ground and will fly through that same gunfire to cover your break turn to keep you safe. And the crazy thing is I don't even have to ask him to do it.

I am a so slow at typing on this iPad, I will be 47 in two minutes, I am not sure exactly when I was born but its almost midnight. Well now it's midnight so Happy Birthday to me. I hope this year is a good year and that all the people I love continue to be around to enjoy it with me. I miss Marie and the Girls and Robby I am so proud of you and all you have done at school. I always new you had it in you and I know you will get a 4.0 next semester as well. I look forward to FaceTiming with you guys this weekend and I hope that the four of you celebrate my Birthday at my favorite Italian restaurant, and you all know where that is. You guys will have to send me some pictures from those new high speed phones that you all have. Well Elli and Shirley should be getting off the Buss soon so I think I will cut this one short so I can try to FaceTime with them tonight. All my love to everyone on my Birthday, night all

Pretty tired

Well flew three hours, not a long flight but it made me pretty tired. Tomorrow I will be able to take another ambien before I go to bed I am not on the flight schedule Friday but I have to give three pilots briefs. I am doing three to make sure all my pilots are able to get to one and receive the information that I am trying to put out. We have a lot of policy letters coming down from BDE (brigade) than I need to put out. I forward them to my flight operations officer who scans them and put them in my reading card file that I am responsible for but Alex manages for me. Alex is first generation Romanian who came to the US as a teen and he is one of our PI's ( pilot). So anyway even though I am off Friday I will still spend all day at the office doing classes, one at 1100 another at 1500 and then the last one at 1900. It will be a long day but I have to make sure the information gets out. Most of it deals with ROE( rules of engagement) and some with minimum equipment that the aircraft needs to have to take off.

Well I tried to FaceTime with the girls at 3:15 PM and now it's 3:35 PM so I think I will try one more time before I go to bed hope all are well, will write more soon, night all

Finally asked the Doc for help

I finally gave up, I don't sleep we'll as most of you know so I finally went to the Doc and asked for some help. The name of my help is ambien and it helps pretty good. Of course I can only take it on nights when I am not flying the next day but none the less it helps me get a restful night sleep. Last night Mike Carman and I did his APART and after we were done we both went to see the Doc. It was about midnight but that did not stop us and the Doc was glad to help us both out. Mike is going to team one tomorrow and he just needed something to help him adjust to his new shift. He will start briefing at 0500 in the morning, ouch. I am on team two for the most part I brief sometime around 1300 or so and my shift ends anywhere between 2300 and 0200. On this shift I have the potential to fly folks daytime and nighttime so it makes it easy to do APARTS and progressions.

There has been lots of rumors as to when this FOB will close, I am not in the rumor business so I stay clear but if we are not here for nine months it sure would not hurt my feelings. We have a Seal team that wants to come here and set up shop since we are in the middle of their area of operation, can't say I blame them I have grown pretty fond of this place. The food is not to bad and the mountains to the south of the FOB are actually quite beautiful to look at. I am on tomorrow to do Ross Small's APART he has all his day task complete so it should beretta quick. I hope to get as many APARTS done as I can. Dave Lewis is coming to team two between Dave and I, I am sure we will be up to date in no time.

I am going to try to FaceTime with the girls here in a little bit I have struck out the last three night in a row. No one answers and I try to call five or six times a night. I hope the iPad is ok, I know Elli is taking good care of it. I also know the girls are back in school and they are all pretty busy, I miss them and I hope they are doing well. The weather here is cold and nasty just like I figured it would be before I even got here. And to make matters worse the burn pit is about a half mile if that from where I live work and sleep. So it always stinks of burning plastic and God knows what else, I am sure we are all breathing so horrible toxins that we will read ten years from now may cause cancer. In fairness to the ARMY they did put the burn pit down wind but it seems that more times than not the wind blows that crap right over us. I will have to do some homework on that one, ill keep you all posted. Well I think it's time to try to call home so I will sign off for now, night all

Trying to stay motivated

Well so far so good, I am trying to stay motivated however it is really tough sometimes. We are being pulled so many different directions and yet we still need to always do the right thing. What makes it so hard sometimes is the simple fact that this country will never change, once we pack up and move out these people we resort to the same barbaric things they have been doing for over a century. It will never end, and as hard as we try to help them out of the stone ages they will fall back to what they know. And that in itself makes me so sad I relate everything to how I would like for these kids to have a chance and no mater how I keep playing it out in my head it always ends the same way. There is no future in this country for anyone the poor will remain poor and the drug-lords will remain in power like the thugs they have been for decades. And when I say drug lords I am not suggesting that they are rolling in the dough because that is not the case. The average Afghani makes two thousand dollars a year but a drug grower might make five thousand dollars a year. As you can see the real money is made on the blood sweat and tears of these peasant opium growers. And they will never get rich off what they grow its is just a little better than the average wage in this country.

I miss Marie and the kids, I am ready to close this chapter and move on. It's hard to try so hard to make a difference when I know in my heart the fight will never be won. With the draw down being played out in the political arena and the end date written in stone by the commander in chief, this fight is over. All I can do at this point is do my best to make sure all of my guys are doing the right things that will keep them out of harms way and get them home.

Eight months to go, unless we get out of here early for some reason and no one really knows what the time frame is for retrograde operations, time will tell. On a positive note I have the best family a man could ever ask for and for that I am truly blessed and thankful. I will be trying to FaceTime with them tonight as soon as I post this so on that note I am out of here, night all

Long day

Long day going to bed I am on to fly tomorrow too. I hope all are safe and sound at home I miss you guys and I wish I could be there. I will be off shift day after tomorrow and I hope to face time with Marie and the kids on Saturday, night all

Keeping Busy

Well I do my best to keep busy around this place most of the time. I fly I work I do paperwork till my eyes bleed I eat and I sleep then I start the process all over again, its a never ending vicious cycle. As most of you know from the last time I was here this is not the fighting season it is to cold for fighting, snow and sandals just do not mix. This gives us a great opportunity to train our guys and get them ready for the fighting season which historical starts about March April time frame. Flying in the mountains can be a wonderful thing the scenery is breath taking and the snow capped mountains really are something to see. We have no idea what this spring will deliver to us rumor has it they know we are leaving and some think they do not want to provoke us into spending any additional time in their country, again time will tell. i try to keep up with the news back in the states as best I can, its hard with the slow Internet we have but I do the best I can.

I got to face time with Marie and the kids the other night, and when I say kids I am including Sam Smith, she came down for a extended visit to spend some time with Marie and the girls. I am sure it will be nice to have her there and I hope they all have a great time. Sam, welcome and stay as long as you like.

I will try to put some pictures up tonight but I will have to shrink them so it doesn't take all night again I hope all is well and I will write more soon, night all